I know I'm a few days late on this, but I just wanted to take the time to give a little long-distance-love to my Mama.
As I read all the sweet posts (like here and here) that my blog-friends posted about their mothers or about being a mother, I started thinking about the earliest memories I have with my Mom.
(Age 4) We used to play together in the dirt under the trees in the backyard, catching ants with her soup spoons and trying to make miniature ant farms out of dixie cups. I don't think she knew how jealous the other kids were that my Mom wasn't afraid to sit on the ground and get a little dirty every once in a while.
(Age 1-12) Every time we went to the grocery store she would head straight to the goldfish crackers or pretzels and rip open a bag so that we would have something to munch on together while she shopped. She probably still does this, I am not sure.
(Age 5) Our extended family used to go snow skiing together all the time, and I would fight to ride the chair lift with my Mom because she would take my mittens off and let me reach in her pockets to find the licorice nibs and necco wafers she had stashed away. She still almost ALWAYS has candy in her purse... definitely where I get my sweet tooth.
(Age 6) She made us matching dresses for Easter and would give me the fancy scraps to sew on my mini-sewing machine. I am SO thankful that she gave me a love for crafting and art, and taught me most everything I know.
This Mother's Day felt so different without my Mom or either Grandma nearby to love on. Even though I talk to my mom at least once a day (often twice), I couldn't help but call her several different times to get an update on her day and tell her "Happy Mama's Day" and "I love you."
The best part was, I could tell by her voice that EVERY time she answered the phone, she was totally expecting that it would be me. She knew I couldn't help it - she knows I miss her (she knows everything) and she misses me back.
It made things especially harder that she got to spend the day with both of my grandma's, aunts, uncles, cousins, and my dad and brother... most of which I now only see once or twice a year.
I felt so disconnected from my family - like I was up in a tree in the backyard looking down on everyone while the tears and screams that come with their laughter floated up around me through the leaves.
I couldn't help picturing them around the big table at my aunt's house, talking and giggling about nothing and everything. Watching the puppies play in the backyard. I would have given almost anything to be there, and I'll admit that I shed more than a few tears of my own on Sunday out of longing and frustration of being so far away.
In my own little world, G was tender and comforting like he ever-so-always is, and the animals were snuggly and precious. As we enjoyed our Sunday together, I realized that to Remy and Zoe, I'm a kind-of-mother to them, and that they count on G and I for everything. It made me feel better to be needed (and I definitely felt loved), and when we left for a BBQ at a friends house in the evening, I felt downright cheery. (Possibly also due to the fact that Rem and Zo pooled their allowances together to buy me a reallyfabulouslypretty long gold necklace as a Mother's Day gift...)
Gold Corfu Necklace, from (of course) J.Crew
Looking back on my Mother's Day, I realize how relaxing and fun it was to spend time with my now-family and now-friends. Someday, I'm sure I'll live closer to my Mama (because we stick together like glue), but until then, I'll enjoy the life I have here and when we're all reunited, it'll be that much more special. I can't wait!!!
You're the best, Mama, and I hope you always feel as special and amazing and beautiful as you truly are!
I love you!